一、習作要求：

請以“Saving the Earth”為題，寫一篇80詞左右的短文。

二、學生習作：

As time goes by,humans are making the earth sick.People cut down too much trees①and leave more and more rubbish here and there.Factories let out their waste without doing anything to it.All this has caused many serious problems.More and more good farmland has turned into desert,the rivers and lakes have polluted②and the water in them is dirty and poisonous.The air is less clean,even the temperature of the earth is higher than before.The earth is sick now.What should we do to save her?

First,we should stop people from pouring waste directly into the air or rivers.

Second,planting more trees and grass is a good idea.It can stop the wind from blowing the earth away.What’s more,forests can make the air clean and fresh.

We have only one earth.We should do useful something③to protect it.It is our home.Protecting the earth is our duty.

(江蘇省贛榆縣羅陽中學九(1)班 孟琦)

點評

1.優(yōu)點

本文小作者以“拯救地球”為話題，從破壞植被引起土地沙漠化、傾倒垃圾污染環(huán)境等方面闡述了人類對地球的傷害，說明了保護地球、保護環(huán)境的重要性以及如何保護地球、保護環(huán)境的措施，行文流暢，通俗易懂，是一篇不錯的習作。

2.需要修改的地方

① too much改為 too many。too much修飾不可數名詞，too many修飾復數可數名詞。

②have polluted改為have been polluted。結合上文，此處應使用現(xiàn)在完成時的被動語態(tài)。

③ useful something改為 something useful。形容詞修飾不定代詞，應放在不定代詞后面。

3.評分

按江蘇省連云港市中考英語作文滿分20分的評分標準，本文修改前可得17分。