本期點評名師
Dear Mr.Xu,
I am writing to you to ask for a sick leave.
Last Saturday I went to visit my dear aunt and I was caught in the rain on the way to home①.That night I had a headache.My father took my temperature and found I had got a high fever.He took me to see a doctor the next day.The doctor said I had a bad cold and asked me to stay in bed two days②.So I can’t come to school today and I can’t take part in the football match to be held on Tuesday,too③.I will be very thankful to you that④you give me a kind understanding.
Your student,
Li Yanyan
河北省阜城縣古城中學九年級(2)班 李巖巖
1.優(yōu)點:
本文是一張病假條,屬于應(yīng)用文體裁。本文寫作格式正確,語言流暢,條理清晰,語句通順。在正文中小作者把請假的原因及時間描述得十分清楚。
2.需要修改的地方:
①to home應(yīng)改為home。home在此處是副詞,其前面無需加介詞to。
② two days應(yīng)改為for two days。時間段前面通常要用介詞for。
③too應(yīng)改為either。too一般用于肯定句,而either一般用于否定句。
④that應(yīng)改為if。分析句意可知這里應(yīng)是一個由if引導的條件狀語從句。
3.評分:
按照中考英語作文滿分20分的標準,本文修改前可得17分。