Last summer， I went to Qingdao with my parents. We took a high-speed rail and after an hour we got to Qingdao. It was a beautiful city. The sky was blue and the air was clean.

On the second day after we got to Qingdao， we went to one of the most famous beach①. I was so careless that I lost our camera on the bus. We were very worried， so we got back② the bus station to look for it. To our surprise， we found a young man stand③ beside the bus， with our camera in his hand. We were so thankful.

My trip to Qingdao seemed short and tiring， but my memory of the trip is lasting and pleasant.

江蘇省贛榆縣羅陽中學(xué)八（1）班 劉權(quán)基

1. 優(yōu)點(diǎn)：

文章條理清楚，思路清晰。首先，介紹旅游的時(shí)間、目的地、交通工具等信息；然后，描述旅游過程中的具體活動(dòng)及所見所聞等；最后，表達(dá)旅游后的感受。全文通順流暢，是一篇值得推薦的學(xué)生習(xí)作。

2. 需要修改的地方：

①beach改為beaches。one of后接可數(shù)名詞的復(fù)數(shù)形式；

②get back改為get back to。“get back to+具體地點(diǎn)”意為“返回某地”；

③stand改為standing。find sb. / sth. doing sth.，意為“發(fā)現(xiàn)某人或某物正在做某事”。

3. 評(píng)分：

按江蘇省連云港市中考英語作文滿分20分的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，本文修改前可得17分。