本期點(diǎn)評(píng)名師
張超 男,河北省衡水市阜城縣第四中學(xué)高級(jí)英語(yǔ)教師、縣骨干教師、市優(yōu)秀英語(yǔ)教師,從事英語(yǔ)教育教學(xué)工作30 多年;多年來(lái),在省級(jí)以上報(bào)刊發(fā)表文章數(shù)百篇,并有多篇文章獲獎(jiǎng);曾參與多本教輔資料的編寫工作;曾榮獲“中央教育科學(xué)研究所全國(guó)基礎(chǔ)教育科研先進(jìn)個(gè)人”榮譽(yù)稱號(hào);曾多次輔導(dǎo)多名學(xué)生在市、省和國(guó)家級(jí)英語(yǔ)競(jìng)賽中獲獎(jiǎng)。
Children?need to play and relax! Children want tohave good time①!
Every teacher wants their students to study hard at school. Every mother wantsher child to study hard at home, too. Mothers alwayssays②, “You need to study toget into a good senior school. And you need to study to get into a university. So now,you must study hard! ”
Look! Pleaselook us at③! We are busy reading. We are tired! Why? Why do westudy to get into a good senior school and university? In China, if you study at agood senior school and university, then you can have a good job. Probably you willwork harder so that you can have more and more money. But so what? We needhappy④, not money! We are just children! 河北省阜城縣第四中學(xué)萬(wàn)彥紅
河北省阜城縣第四中學(xué)萬(wàn)彥紅
優(yōu)點(diǎn):
小作者多次使用感嘆句及設(shè)問(wèn)表達(dá)真實(shí)情感,有利于吸引讀者的注意。
需要修改的地方:
①在have 后加a。have a good time 意為“玩得開(kāi)心”。
②says 改為say。句子主語(yǔ)mothers 是復(fù)數(shù)形式,根據(jù)主謂一致原則,謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞應(yīng)使say。
③look us at 改為look at us。短語(yǔ)look at 中,at 是介詞,不是副詞。
④happy 改為happiness。need 是及物動(dòng)詞,其后需要接名詞作賓語(yǔ)。評(píng)分院
按照中考英語(yǔ)作文滿分20 分的標(biāo)準(zhǔn),本文修改前可得18 分。