陶秉彤

你的假期生活是什么樣的？都到過哪些有趣的地方？請寫寫你認為最有趣或最有意義的一次旅游，描述一下你的假期生活。

I had a wonderful time on my National Day Holiday. I went to Dalian with my family. I was so happy. We visited the famous beach——Laohutan. It was very beautiful. I liked it very much. I was very excited to see the sea for the first time in my life. We walked along the beach. It was relaxing. And I played beach volleyball with my mother. It was interesting. I tried paragliding with my sister. I felt like I was a bird. It was so exciting. We also watched a dolphin show and played with the dolphins. They were very friendly. And we ate some delicious seafood. We also took quite a few photos there. I really had a good time this National Day Holiday.

簡評：文章描述了十一假期的生活，描寫細致，敘述內(nèi)容完整，句子結(jié)構(gòu)基本正確，語句較連貫，是一篇很好的習作。亮點句子I felt like I was a bird.用得很好，準確地寫出了玩滑翔傘運動時的感受。但是要想得高分，還是要多用一些不同句式。

（指導教師：馬艷紅）