籍萬杰 楊靜

活動類新聞稿是常見的寫作題材。這一類新聞稿的結(jié)構(gòu)一般是：第一段寫導語，內(nèi)容通常包含主/承辦單位、參與人員、時間、地點、活動名稱等；第二段主要寫活動的過程，活動現(xiàn)場以及現(xiàn)場觀眾、青年學生的反應；第三段則評論開展本次活動的意義。下面以一道高考題為例，談談活動類新聞稿的寫作方法。

[真題回放]

（2013江西卷）星光中學（Xingguang High School）近期舉行了一次登山活動。假定你是學校英語報記者，請寫一篇短文，報道此次活動。內(nèi)容包括：

1. 時間與地點：4月10日，大青山（Daqing Mountain）；

2. 活動的過程；

3. 你對于這次活動的評論。

注意： 1. 詞數(shù)120左右。2. 可適當增加細節(jié)，以使行文連貫。

[試題分析]

1. 審題

體裁：活動類新聞稿，屬于應用文寫作；

人稱：第一人稱為主；

時態(tài)：一般過去時。

2. 思路

首先，交代活動的目的、時間、地點、人物；其次，敘述活動的過程和細節(jié)；最后，總結(jié)和評價活動。

3. 錯誤呈現(xiàn)（學生習作錯句摘選）

1. From this experience， we all know that the road to success is never smooth. Only if we keep up our mind can we success.

2. In spite of the hardship， all of us made our efforts to arrive the top.

3. This experience not only did we aware of the importance of teamwork but also arose our interest about nature.

4. All the way we sang， chatted and enjoying the fresh air and beautiful scenery.

5. Standing on the mountain and I was proud of myself.

6. The students were so excited that cant wait climbing the mountain.

[修改建議]

1. success改為succeed。Only位于句首引起倒裝句，情態(tài)動詞can提前，后面應該接動詞原形，故用動詞succeed。

2. arrive后加at。arrive是不及物動詞，后面接賓語應加介詞at。

3. 該句錯誤較多，比較混亂。這位同學本想使用not only ... but also ...引起倒裝句，但是對句型把握不到位，出現(xiàn)了一些錯誤。建議修改句子為：Not only did the experience make us aware of the importance of teamwork， but also it aroused our interest in nature.

4. 該句出現(xiàn)了謂語動詞和非謂語部分并列的錯誤。建議把句子修改為：All the way we sang and chatted， enjoying the fresh air and the beautiful scenery.

5. 去掉and，在I前面加逗號，本句成現(xiàn)在分詞作伴隨狀語。

6. 該句出現(xiàn)了從句中缺少主語，時態(tài)不一致和固定搭配錯誤。修改后的句子為：The students were so excited that they couldnt wait to climb the mountain.

[佳句欣賞]

With the purpose of arousing students interest in nature and improving students health， our school organized a mountain climbing on April 10th recently， which attracted a good many students to take part in it. （朱麗瑩）

Our persistence and strong will led us to the top of the mountain where we all were hooked on what we saw. （董勤?。?/p>

It was persistence that made us have a good view of the top at last. （潘建琪）

Painful as I was， I still kept on climbing with the company of my classmates. （何靜）

This mountain climbing taught us that we should attach great importance to persisting our dreams and they are bound to be achieved sooner or later. （王加麗）

This unforgettable experience not only broadened our horizons but also made us become aware of the importance of helping others. （徐強）

[范文呈現(xiàn)]

In order to encourage the students to take outdoor exercise， our school organized a mountain-climbing on April 10. Hundreds of us took part in it.

It was a nice day. At 8：00 am， we gathered at the foot of Daqing Mountain and set out for the top in high spirits. All the way we were chatting， singing and laughing， enjoying the fresh air and the beautiful scenery. When some fell behind， others would come and lend a helping hand. About 2 hours later， we all reached the top. Bathed in sunshine， we jumped and cheered with joy.

The activity benefited us a lot. Not only did it get us close to nature and give us relaxation from heavy school work， it also promoted the friendship among us. What a wonderful time！

[實戰(zhàn)演練]

為了豐富學生課余生活，你校近期舉辦了辯論賽（debate competition）。假定你是校英語報記者，上周三，你觀看了其中一場比賽，請根據(jù)以下要點提示寫一篇短文，報道這場辯論賽：

1. 來自高一高二的八名辯手參加了這場比賽，辯題為“學習是否需要興趣”；

2. 辯論過程中雙方的表現(xiàn)以及比賽結(jié)果；

3. 對這次辯論賽的評價（如： 拓寬了學生視野，提高了團隊意識，激發(fā)了學習興趣，培養(yǎng)了交際能力等）。

注意： 1. 詞數(shù)120左右。2. 可適當增加細節(jié)，以使行文連貫。

參考詞匯：辯手debater 正方positive side 反方negative side

[試題分析]

1. 審題

文體：活動類新聞稿；

人稱：第三人稱；

時態(tài)：一般過去時。

2. 思路

第1段：舉行辯論賽的目的及時間；

第2段：辯論過程及結(jié)果；

第3段：辯論賽的意義。

3. 選詞組句

豐富學生課余生活：enrich students spare life

正方持有……觀點，然而在反方看來……：the positive side held the view that ... while the negative side believed ...

精彩/出色的表現(xiàn)：excellent/outstanding/brilliant performance

高度評價：think highly of

拓寬了學生的視野：broaden the students horizons

提高了團隊意識：promote the sense of cooperation

激發(fā)了學習興趣：motivate/arouse students interest in learning

培養(yǎng)了交際能力：develop the communication skills/ability

4. 連句成篇

Aiming at enriching the students spare life， our school held some debate competitions recently， one of which I witnessed last Wednesday.

Eight debaters from Grade One and Two participated in the competition， who debated on/over whether interest is needed in our study. The positive side held the view that its necessary to be interested in what we learn. On the contrary/However， as far as the negative side was concerned， there is no need to develop an interest in our subjects. They considered interest as a motivation not a necessity. All the debaters gave excellent performances， especially in the free debate period. Eventually， the opposition won the debate for their cooperation and outstanding performance.

All the audiences and students think highly of the debate competition. Not only did it broaden students horizons， but also it promoted their sense of cooperation. Meanwhile， it motivated/aroused students interest in studying as well as developed their communication competence/skills.