Pet寵物

前情提要：我的生日最后被喬叔叔的狗奇勒搞砸了，為了補(bǔ)償，媽媽帶著我、曼尼和羅德里克去購(gòu)物廣場(chǎng)買(mǎi)禮物……Sunday星期天

Mom handed us each a five-dollar bill and told us we could buy whatever we wanted, but fivebucksdoesn't exactly get you very far in a pet store. I finallysettled onthis really cool angelfish that's all different colors.

老媽給我們每人5塊錢(qián)，讓我們想要啥就買(mǎi)啥?？墒?塊錢(qián)在寵物店里能買(mǎi)什么呢。我的目標(biāo)最后鎖定了一條長(zhǎng)得很帥的神仙魚(yú)，它身上有各種顏色。

Rodrick picked out a fish, too. I don't know what kind it was, but the reason Rodrick chose it was because the label on the tank said the fish was “aggressive.”

羅德里克選的也是魚(yú)。我不知道他選的是什么魚(yú)。羅德里克買(mǎi)它是因?yàn)橘N在水族箱上的標(biāo)簽說(shuō)這條魚(yú)“富有攻擊性”。

Manny spent HIS five bucks on fish food. At first I thought it was because he wanted to feed the fish that me and Rodrick bought, but by the time we got home, Manny had eaten half thecanister.

曼尼的5塊錢(qián)全買(mǎi)了魚(yú)飼料。起初我以為他想用這飼料喂我和羅德里克的魚(yú)。不過(guò)等我們回到家，我發(fā)現(xiàn)曼尼已經(jīng)吃掉了半盒飼料。

Key points

buck 美元 settle on決定，選定 aggressive富于攻擊性的 canister小罐

Monday星期一

This is the first time I've had my very own pet, and I'm kind of getting into it. I feed my fish three times a day, and I keep his bowl really clean.

這是我第一次擁有自己的寵物，我有點(diǎn)愛(ài)上它了。我每天喂三次魚(yú)，把小魚(yú)缸刷得干干凈凈。

I even bought a journal so I could keeptrackof everything my fish does during the day. I have to admit, though, I'm starting to have a little trouble filling up the pages.

我還寫(xiě)了一本養(yǎng)魚(yú)日記，每天記錄魚(yú)的一舉一動(dòng)。不過(guò)我得承認(rèn)，我開(kāi)始覺(jué)得填滿(mǎn)一頁(yè)日記有點(diǎn)困難。

I asked Mom and Dad if we could buy one of thoseaquariumsand get atonof fish to keep my little guycompany.But Dad said that aquariums cost money and maybe I could ask for one for Christmas.

我問(wèn)老爸老媽可不可以買(mǎi)一個(gè)水族箱，再買(mǎi)一堆魚(yú)給我的小家伙做伴?？衫习终f(shuō)水族箱很貴，也許到了圣誕節(jié)我可以要水族箱做禮物吧。

Key points

track 足跡，蹤跡 aquarium 養(yǎng)魚(yú)缸 ton 許多 company 作伴；公司

See, this is whatstinksabout being a kid. You only get two shots at getting stuff you want, and that's on Christmas and your birthday.And then when one of those days DOES come, your parentsmessthingsupand buy you a Ladybug.

看到了吧，這就是做小孩吃虧的地方。每年你只有兩次機(jī)會(huì)可以得到你想要的東西，那就是圣誕節(jié)和你的生日。而等這兩個(gè)日子真的到來(lái)，你父母就把事情搞砸，給你買(mǎi)一個(gè)“甲殼蟲(chóng)小姐”。

If I had my own money, I could just buy whatever I wanted and not have toembarrassmyself every time I needed to rent a video game or buy a piece of candy or something.

要是我自己有錢(qián)，就可以想要什么就買(mǎi)什么，省得每次我想租一盤(pán)游戲碟或者買(mǎi)一塊糖果的時(shí)候都要丟臉。

Anyway, I've always known that I'll eventually be rich and famous,but I'm starting to get a little concerned that it hasn't happened yet. I figured I’d at LEAST have my own reality TV show by now.

不管怎么說(shuō)，我知道自己以后一定會(huì)名利雙全。不過(guò)我有點(diǎn)擔(dān)心，為什么到現(xiàn)在還沒(méi)有什么苗頭。我覺(jué)得到現(xiàn)在我至少應(yīng)該有一檔自己的電視真人秀節(jié)目。

Key points

stink 讓人覺(jué)得很糟糕 mess up 弄糟；攪亂 embarrass 使尷尬

Last night I was watching one of those television shows where anannylives with a family for a week and then tells them all the ways they'rescrewing up.

昨天晚上我一直看電視真人秀，說(shuō)的是有個(gè)保姆和一個(gè)家庭同住一周，逐樣逐樣指出那一家人如何把家里弄得亂七八糟。

Well, I don’t know if the woman had to go to some special nanny school or something, but that’s the kind of job I was BORN to do.

不知道那位女士是不是上過(guò)什么保姆特殊培訓(xùn)班，不過(guò)我天生就是做這種工作的料子。

I just need tofigure outhow to get myself in line for that job when the nannyretires.

這個(gè)保姆遲早會(huì)退休不干，我現(xiàn)在要做的就是搞清楚怎么才能進(jìn)入保姆的候補(bǔ)人選名單。

Key points

nanny 保姆 screw up把……搞糟 figure out 弄清楚 retire 退休

The End

本欄目選自《小屁孩日記7—從天而降的巨債》（中英雙語(yǔ)版），由新世紀(jì)出版社授權(quán)選載。