本期點評名師
張祖平 男,80后英語教師,就職于浙江省紹興市樹人中學(xué),愛好閱讀、翻譯和寫作。在英語教學(xué)中,注重分層教學(xué),尤其善于激勵英語薄弱的學(xué)生,用他們的興趣愛好,引導(dǎo)他們進行愉快閱讀。自主研發(fā)的“E飛英語口語考試小程序”榮獲2018年紹興市教師自制教具比賽一等獎。
My Good Friend
I have a good friend. Hes① name is Mike. He likes singing and he can dance very well. He is good at making friends. In the morning, he gets up early. After school, he usually does exercises② with his friends for half an hour. He goes home③ at 5:15. He eats lots of vegetables for dinner. He thinks its④ good for his health. At night, he either watches TV or does his homework. He goes to bed at 9:30. He is a good boy. Do you want to be his friend?
浙江省紹興市樹人中學(xué)七(5)班 曾江濤
1. 優(yōu)點:
本文緊扣要點,語言簡潔,把好友Mike的愛好、特長和作息規(guī)律有條不紊地表達出來。短文準確地使用了at、in、after、with、for等介詞,這是本文的一大亮點。此外,文中還使用了either...or...結(jié)構(gòu),該結(jié)構(gòu)中的動詞watches和does也使用正確,這也是文章獲得高分的關(guān)鍵。
2. 需要修改的地方:
①Hes改為His。Hes是He is的縮寫,此處要表達“他的名字”,所以應(yīng)該用His name。
②exercises改為exercise。exercise意為“鍛煉”,在沒有說明鍛煉類型時,一般作不可數(shù)名詞,不能加s。
③goes home改為gets home。根據(jù)上下文應(yīng)該是“到家”,所以get home比go home更好, get home是“到了家里”,go home是回家。
④its改為theyre。此處its指代的應(yīng)為前一句的vegetables,因此應(yīng)該用theyre。
3. 評分:
按浙江省紹興市中考英語作文滿分10分的評分標準,本文修改前可得8分。