石繼忠
The Spring Festival is the greatest traditional festival in China. It is also the happiest day for children. During the festival, beside① beautiful new clothes and good food, children can also get some wonderful presents from their parents and their grandparents. Sometimes they will get some money as a symbol (標(biāo)志) of good luck. Of course their parents will take back most of money and only leave a few②? for their children to buy the things they like. These years our life is getting better and better. And children can get more and more presents for the festival. Just at the beginning of this term, some of my classmates told me that they got a lots③ of money from their parents in this Spring Festival. Few even got as many④ as five hundred yuan and they could use the money to buy any expensive thing they like.
I thought it was good for children to get some presents for the Spring Festival. But if the parents give their children too much money, they will form bad habits. We are young and our country is still not rich, our parents should teach us how to live frugally.
山東梁山楊營中學(xué)九年級3班 楊文海
點評
1. 優(yōu)點:
本文結(jié)構(gòu)嚴(yán)謹(jǐn),敘事清楚,層次分明,過渡自然,是一篇相當(dāng)不錯的習(xí)作。
2. 需要修改的地方:
① beside改為besides。besides意為“除……之外”。
② few改為little。a little修飾不可數(shù)名詞。
③ lots改為lot。a lot of=lots of,后加可數(shù)名詞或不可數(shù)名詞均可。
④ many改為much。在這里指的是錢,所以用much。
3. 評分:
按中考英語作文滿分15分的評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn),本文修改前可得13分。